


To be loved

by unicornmoony



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Cute, Falling In Love, Fluff, Insecure!Thranduil, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-13
Updated: 2016-01-28
Packaged: 2018-05-06 14:01:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5419739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unicornmoony/pseuds/unicornmoony
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>First his wife, now his son. Thranduil is overcome with emotions, he begins to think that he is incapable of loving. That is, until a certain Lord of Dale comes along.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part One:

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! This is my first Barduil fic, I hope it's okay. Thankyou for reading!!   
> Stay lovely.

"Because it was real." It was real.  
Unable to say anymore, the Elven King turned and walked on until he knew he was out of sight. It was only then that he let them out. Tears, fierce, angry tears; tears that had been held in since his wife was taken from him. Tears full of emotion and love and heartbreak and pain.  
He took off his upper body armour, letting it fall will a delicate clatter onto the floor. He himself however, sank to the floor in a manner that was not like the graceful one he usually acquired.   
Thranduil let out a violent sob, surprising himself that he was capable of such human emotion; such emotion that he had not felt since his heart was stolen so unexpectedly from him. He began to think of all the things he had done in his life, all the bad things, all the selfish things and all the things that had caused hurt to others: hurt that he told himself he did not care about. About Legolas, his only son, a son that he had basically ignored his whole life, and now he was gone. It was all flowing out of him in tears of regret.   
But a sudden noise jolted him back to his senses, he quietly stood up and grabbed his sword- someone was approaching him. The unknown intruder of his thoughts was getting closer. But before they could reveal themself, Thranduil turned the corner, his sword drawn.   
To his surprise it was Bard standing there, in equal shock. Shock not from Thranduils'   
sword, but from his tear distraught face.   
"I thought you an Orc." Thranduil said, bringing his sword down.   
"I was just coming up to check that they were all dead." Bard replied, staring in disbelief at the elf.   
Thranduil did not reply, he simply bowed his head and turned, not thinking himself in the mood for a conversation.   
"I beg your pardon, my lord Thranduil but, are you alright?" a nervous Bard asked.   
Thranduil stopped and looked up, silent tears flowing once again.   
"Beg my pardon, Bard the dragon slayer, but do I look okay?" he spoke and turned in such a harsh manner that Bard jumped back in surprise. "First my Queen. Now my son. Tell me, am I incapable of loving? Or being loved in return?" he shouted, his aching soul on full display.  
Bard didn't know what to do or say. He had only known the Elven King for a few days but he suspected that he wasn't very big on comfort and love.   
"I know how you feel. Heartbreak. Loss. I lost my wife too." Bard said, his heart sinking as he spoke.   
"That you may have, but pray tell, have you lost your family as well? Your son? Your daughters?" Thranduil said, his wild and uncontrollable tears still streaming. He ran his shaking fingers through his sleek hair, letting his crown fall carelessly onto the stone floor.  
Bard just stared, a small tear slipping from his eye too as he felt all kinds of emotion for the lost King.   
"Have you just watched the only part of her still living walk away, having never heard his father tell him how much he loves him? Because his father was too scared to tell him, to scared to show emotion? Because the last time he did, something awful happened. Will you return to your home tonight alone and broken?" Thanduil bellowed, his vioce cracking at the realisation of his last question. Why he was telling a man he just met all this, he didn't know, but he just desperately wanted to get it all out.   
"But you aren't alone and you never will be." Bard spoke softly, his loving fatherly manner coming through.   
"Is that so?"  
"Yes. Because I'll be there for you."   
A flash of love went through the elf's eyes and he felt his heart jolt.   
"But why? Why would you wish to help a heartless elf like me?" he asked, sounding vulnerable.  
"Because I have felt the heartbreak you feel. Losing someone once is terrible, but I can't even imagine the pain of losing someone twice." Bard said, placing his hand on Thranduils' shoulder, who didn't even push it away.   
"Thankyou." Thranduil replied, his voice full of shock and affection.  
His tense and angry body relaxed and his tears were different. They were the tears of someone who needed someone. Someone to hold them and care for them and love them. They were the tears of someone who just wanted to love and be loved in return.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bard steps into his new role as Lord of Dale and asks Thranduil to dance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, hooray, I've decided that Thorin, Fili and Kili are alive because I just love them too much.   
> I'll try to post every Sunday! I hope you like this chapter, it may be a tad forward?   
> Have the most wonderful Christmas & stay lovely. ♡♡

Once he had returned to Dale, and the Elven King Mirkwood, Bard felt a sudden loss. A sudden need, or excitement. He felt like he was young and falling in love- he felt like he really wanted to see Thranduil again.   
However, his thoughts about the elf and his sparkling eyes were interrupted by many a question from his fellow towns folk, who now saw him as their King, and he hadn't an idea how to answer.   
He gathered the people together, what was left of them anyway. Seeing now how many had perished in the battle had broke his heart.   
Standing on a city ruin, he began;  
"People of Laketown! We are now the people of Dale and we will work hard to make sure that this city will become the beautiful, wealthy one it was once before!" many people cheered in agreement, "We have lost many people today, and may we let them be remembered! Let us love them and cherish their memory until the day we die!" he stopped as the applause of the crowd was so loud, "Yes we lost many, but we also showed love and passion and sacrifice for one another." he continued again, "And I just want each and every one of you to know that you are so wonderfully brave. You all deserve endless happiness after the hardship we have all been through.. and I promise, from the bottom of my heart, I will give you that!"   
The people of Dale stood before him, their smiles full of delight, their cheers full of hope, their kisses full of love.   
Bard stepped off his stage and was immediately immersed in a hug with his three children. They stepped away, finally free from harm, Bard thought gladly.   
"I love you all so much," he said, stepping towards his eldest daughter.   
"Sigrid. I love you, you're so much like your ma, kind and beautiful," and tear trickled down Sigrid's face.   
"I love you more, Da." She replied, kissing his cheek. He smiled and stepped towards his son.  
"and I love you Bain, my brave, brave boy. I know you will grow to be a remarkable man." Bain blushed, reciving a compliment from his dad was the highest honour as he looked up to him so much.  
"Thankyou." he hugged his dad once more.  
"I love you, Tilda, my little girl, " he knelt down to his smallest, "You are so full of sunshine, never change my love." he said to her, who giggled.   
"I love you, Da!" she said and patted him on the head.  
•••   
A little while later; a message was received from Erebor. It read: 

To Bard,   
Lord of Dale, 

We invite you and all of your townsfolk to a magnificent feast here at Erebor tonight. There will be music and dancing, and many a tale will be told!   
King Thranduil and his Woodland elves have also been invited. We hope this can be the beginning of the unification of our three kingdoms. 

Yours faithfully,   
Thorin Oakenshield 

•••  
After notifying the people of Dale about the royal party tonight, there was a great panic about what they would wear, for they did not even have clothes fit for the halls of Erebor before Smaug had scorched their town.   
As if by some sort of Elvish magic, horses entered Dale, gracefully tugging along carts full of clothes and food.   
There was no sign of Thranduil though, Bard noticed rather bitterly.   
"Thankyou. Thranduil has been very kind to us this day," Bard said to the elf that appeared to be in charge, he nodded and jumped off his horse. He grabbed a pile of robes from his cart and a bottle of blood-red wine.   
"My Lord Thranduil requested specially that you wear these, for they are his own. He also asks that you enjoy a well deserved glass of his best red wine." The elf spoke in a dreamlike way. Bard was very touched, and flattered, he felt himself blushing more and more by the minute.   
•••   
A few hours later, having had a few glasses of wine, Bard laughed as he saw his reflection in a cracked mirror. His new robes were a sea green with gold embroidery, he liked them, but whether or not they suited him was a different matter. He laughed again, or rather an intoxicated giggle, as he thought about Thranduil picking out the perfect robes for him.   
He stepped outside to see his people gathered, all clean and dressed up in Elvish clothes, looking so unlike themselves but maybe that was because they had been so used to seeing each other in dirty rags. 

They made their way up the hill to the Lonely Mountain, only a silhouette beneath the starry sky. The grass, that was as dead as those slain in battle, crunched underneath their feet in the nighttime frost.   
Light was pouring out of the open doors of Erebor, so desperate to be free after being concealed in darkness for so many years; much like the Dwarves, who could be seen dancing merrily.   
Bard found himself becoming increasingly excited and it wasn't because of the party, he admitted to himself, but wouldn't go any further.   
As they reached the doors and entered, Bombur announced them, playing a tune that was so very Dale-like. Thorin came towards him looking clean, and smiling broadly.   
"Bard of Dale! We are so pleased that you could make it. I see the Elves have kindly given up some of their clothes for you," he chuckled slightly, looking out at the vast sea of Thranduils'.   
"Come," he beckoned them in and they moved to where the feast would be heald, upon the golden floor in the Gallery of the Kings. The dwarves of Erebor and the Iron Hills, Bilbo and Gandalf, along with the Mirkwood Elves who had already arrived, applauded them and waved and cheered, some even whistled.   
"Welcome, my friends, to the party." Thorins eyes seemed to be dancing with happiness.  
•••  
The feast was over and after making awkward eye contact and sweet smiles all evening, Thranduil finally plucked up the courage and made his way across the hall and to sit down next to Bard.   
"You look good tonight," Thranduil said once he had sat down, and then regretted it immediately, he felt a hot blush creeping up his neck.   
"I hope you aren't just saying that because I'm in your clothes, my lord." Bard smirked, and raised an eyebrow.   
Thranduil laughed, and then laughed more for he had forgotten how good it felt to really laugh. He couldn't stop, he didn't wanted to stop, even though he wasn't actually laughing at anything, he just couldn't stop. Bard was laughing too, tears if joy sprouting from their bright eyes.   
•••  
"Would it...would it be weird if we danced together?" Bard asked awkwardly after some time, not daring to look Thranduil in the eyes.   
The blush was back, "Yes, I suppose it would." Thranduil answered after a long pause, the air between them became thick but full of want.   
"Yeah. You're right." Bard replied, his heart secretly dropping.   
"But that doesn't mean we can't," Thranduil said and stood up, holding out his hand for Bard to take. He did and they both made their way to the dance floor.  
Both Elf and Man were shocked at their wanting to dance with each other, but neither had felt this way in years, not that they would admit that to themselves.   
As they danced, they stared thoughtfully into each others eyes, with small smiles playing about on their features. Many people stared at them in awe, but most clapped and whistled. It seems that they inspired some too, for Thorin Oakenshield lead Bilbo up to the dance floor, followed by a few raised eye brows and knowing smiles.   
They all danced away into the night, until the first light of a new, hopeful day arrived.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is super short (but sweet..I hope!)   
> Thankyou for reading, I am very much enjoying writing!   
> And thankyou to those who have Kudos'd and commented: you are mighty wonderful for that, it really means a lot!!   
> Stay Lovely.

Humming a sweet dwarvish tune, Thranduil leant back against the cool stone. He did not care that the fact he was sitting on the foot of a giant stone dwarf that was carved into a mountain was very un-king like, nor did he care about the winter chill that was running through his body as it was being fought off with the warmth blossoming in his heart.  
Occasionally he would think of Legolas, and the heartbreak he felt when he'd left: heartbreak he was still feeling now. But there was a light at the end of the tunnel, for Thranduil was oblivious to the fact that Bard was slowly piecing his heart back together.  
He pulled out his pipe and tobacco, something he rarely ever did. Shutting his eyes, he took his first draw, tracing the leafs carefully engraved in the soft wood and let the smoke float out the side of his mouth, and he opened one eye as the smoke took the shape of a star.  
Before Thranduil could take his second draw, the pipe was taken from his hand. He opened his eyes in a rage, preparing to shout at the thief. But rage turned to delight as he saw it was Bard who was sitting next to him; a flash of mischief in his eyes.   
"Oh, just help yourself then," Thranduil drooled sarcastically. Bard laughed and started up on a witty reply, when he started coughing out the smoke.   
"Never had Elvish tobacco?" Thranduil asked, trying to suppress his laughter.   
"..and I don't think I ever will again," Bard wheezed, "but, anything to calm my nerves for the day ahead." he said, moving closer to Thranduil so that their thighs pressed together, the Elf felt his face heat up at this innocent contact.  
"Ah yes, official Lord of Dale." Thranduil said, continuing to puff on the pipe with ease. "How're you feeling?"   
"Anxious. Excited, but more nervous. What if I can't do it?" he said, and looked Thranduil in the eyes.   
"Do what?"   
"Be a good King."   
"Well, you've already made a wonderful leader so far. Your people love you," he grabbed Bards hand and tried to ignore the quickening of his heartbeat and the catch of Bards breath, "You'll be alright." he smiled.  
"Thankyou." Bard said, and Thranduil kissed his knuckles ever so lightly, so soft that it was almost unnoticeable. Thranduil closed his eyes again, embarrassed at his actions and trying to hide his emotions- mostly the shock of how soft and welcoming the bowman's hand was.  
Then came the end of the conversation, which Thranduil was secretly glad about because he didn't think he could take anymore or he'd fall off his foot, they carried on holding each others hands though, both Kings to reluctant to let go.  
"I can practically feel you staring at me." Thranduil said after a while, his eyes still closed. His smile taking over his handsome face as he heard the ever joyful sound of Bards laugh.  
•••

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas! ♡.♡


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I have seen the world fall away and the white lights of forever fill the air."   
>  ⭐

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello !! I'm not too sure about this chapter, but hopefully you will like it!   
> Thankyou to anyone who is following my story, you are ever so wonderful.  
> Also, small warning; there is one swearword in this chapter (although I don't think modern day swearwords were used in middle earth but ah well!)   
> Happy New Year, may your 2016 be filled with unexpected adventures (with wizards and dwarves) !!  
> Stay lovely ❤

Tents had now been put up around Dale as the holes in the walls and the cracks in the ceilings of the little rooms they could find provided very little shelter.   
After visiting the remains of Laketown one last time, to try and find anything in the wreckage, they were kindly provided with tents from Erebor.   
Of course, Bards was the biggest, with a room each for all four of them, it was bigger than their house in Laketown.   
This night was a quiet and peaceful one, with thousands of stars scattered around the sky. His children had gone to bed, so Bard was sitting outside staring up at the little lights and breathing in the crisp night-time air.   
Then came the sound of someone clearing their throat, Bard looked to see an Elf; an Elf of the Woodland Realm no doubt.   
"My Lord Bard," the Elf said quietly, bowing, "King Thranduil asks that you join him on this night, he wishes to... show you something." the Elf requested, looking slightly disturbed.   
Bard had to bite back his smile, feeling like a giddy teen, "Very well." he got up, "You will need to stay here and look after my children."   
"Certainly, My Lord. He is waiting for you at the front entrance."   
Bard nodded his head in thanks and made his way to Thranduil.   
He was standing where the elf said he would, with two horses. As Bard got closer, it was as if the Elven King was glowing. The light of the moon made his blue eyes even more inviting.   
"Evening." Thranduil bowed his head, "I did not think you would come, Master Bard."  
"I would never miss a chance like this, My Lord." Bard said...or flirted? Never the less, a slight tint of rosy could be seen on Thranduils pale cheeks.   
He kept his cool though, raising an eyebrow before answering, "Is that so?"  
"Yes. Most would consider it an honour to spend an evening in the company of King Thranduil." Bard said, smiling but not unaware of the butterflies swarming in his stomach.   
"And do you?" Thranduil said softly, his breath somewhat raspy, "Consider it an honour?" he said, almost in a whisper.   
Bard felt himself blush, "Almost certainly. My Lord." he replied, his chest rising and falling rapidly, not able to take his eyes off of Thranduil.   
"Good." The King said, gaining his full voice back.   
•••  
A short while later, after riding in harmonious silence, they reached a small forest, off the edge of The Lonely Mountain.  
They got off their horses and Thranduil gently took Bards hand, and without looking at him, led him into the forest.  
They reached what seemed to be the middle of the small woods and came to a circular gap in the trees. It was there where Thranduil stopped walking and dropped Bards hand.   
The trees that made the circle were a light colour and they grew tall, their branches and leaves entwined together at the top.   
Pure white flowers grew tangled in the branches but some grew up and joined like vines, creating an angelic shelter.  
Each tree had something carved into it.   
Bard walked up to the first tree, it had tiny little stars drew into it, all around the trunk and in the moonlight they twinkled.   
"Like magic." Bard said gently as he traced a few stars with his fingers.   
The next tree saw the stages of the moon. The full moon stage appeared to be glowing, and Bard looked to the sky; tonight's moon was indeed a full moon.

The next tree was more detailed. A beautiful young woman, or Elf, had been sculpted into the tree. Bard felt a pang in his heart as he realised who it was.   
"I used to come here a lot. When..she died. I found it one night and thought I was wonderful, a perfect view of the stars." and he lay down on the sparkling grass.   
"I had a lot of time on my hands," he sighed.   
Bard lay down next to him, "You mean to say..you did all this?" he asked, wander and awe in his voice.   
Thranduil just nodded, not taking his eyes off the stars.   
"It's amazing."   
Thranduil didn't answer, so Bard just slowly moved his hand into the elf's, who's skin was soft and cold.   
"You're right you know." Bard said after a while.   
"About what?" Thranduil asked, still not drawing his eyes away from the sky as if they would disappear if he did.   
"It is a perfect view...to the stars I mean." "Yes.." It was now Thranduil drew his gaze away, to a different star, he thought, "Perfect."   
•••  
A few hours later and the first song of the morning could be heard. It wasn't light, but it wasn't dark either. The sweet smell of clean morning air could be smelt and pink clouds could be seen in the distance.   
Thranduil and Bard weren't asleep, but still in the same position as last night, lying down next to each other, hands tangled together lightly.   
"We better get going- your guard will be waiting." Bard stood up reluctantly and pulled Thranduil up with him. As he started out of the circle, Thranduil grabbed his hand again and pulled him back, so that their chests were touching; they could feel each others heartbeats.   
"Wait," he whispered, their faces so close together. Then they just stood their, holding each others hands, staring into each others eyes, feeling each others beating hearts.  
And then a small tear slipped out of Thranduils eye.   
"Thankyou." he said.  
"For what?" Bard asked, not realising he'd done something worth thanking.   
Thranduils hair gleamed in the rising sunlight, and his tears shone in its rays.   
He smiled a bright smile, "For being here, for being my friend, for helping me even though I'm a stubborn, heartless bastard."  
Bard laughed, "I don't think you're heartless." and with that he closed the gap between them, closing his eyes and pressing his lips onto Thranduils, for only a few seconds. But what a sweet and passionate and elated few seconds they were, like thousand of flowers had just grown in the saddest parts of them.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Helllooooo!! So sorry its been a while, I've been rather busy with school & stuff :)))   
> I do hope you like this chapter, it's pretty sad & it kinda links to the first chapter.   
> Thankyou so much for reading, I love you ♡  
> Stay lovely !!

At the highest point of the Mirkwood halls, lay Thranduils chambers. In his room the Queen, when she was alive, had a balcony beautifully carved out of the best wood that could be found in the Greenwood.   
Her love for the stars was so strong that she would sit out there every night, for many hours, just staring up at the glittering lights and never did the smile disappear off her face.  
It was there where Thranduil sat on this night, staring up at the same stars as the night before. His lips tingled as he thought about it; he could still feel Bards' touch, like it was in his beating heart, pumping through his veins.  
But the elation he had felt last night had been turned into fear and worry. He had let things go too far.   
He looked over to Dale, and he felt like Bard was looking at the stars too, the stars that had witnessed the adventures of the night before. But Bard would be smiling, oh that smile, Thranduils' heart jumped up at the thought. He wouldn't be feeling the regret that Thranduil was feeling either, he would be happy.   
He had cursed at himself all day, how could he have kissed him?   
How could he let himself feel like this again, he promised he wouldn't. He promised _her_.  She had never asked of such a promise, but Thranduil made it away.   
But he did let himself feel this way again, he broke his promise. He couldn't help it; he felt like he wanted Bard.  
 No, he _needed_ Bard.  
"I'm sorry," he whispered in a shaky voice, looking up into the midnight again and then he couldn't help but let out an ugly sob; because he knew she was up there. He knew she was the brightest star of all. The one that came out every single night, the one twinkled and filled his heart with love everytime it did.   
Deep down he knew that she would be happy for him, she had a very kind soul and a beautiful heart - much like Bard in fact. Maybe that was just his type.   
Thranduil also knew that he should stop using his Queen as an excuse, that it was all him, he was just afraid.   
And that after all these years he just wanted To Be Loved.  
•••  
It was two weeks before the Lord of Dale and the Elven King saw each other again, for they could not be seen visiting each other every other day... and there was also the fact that Thranduil hadn't answered any of Bards letters, (but Bard didn't want to think about that much).   
He took leave from Dale on a sunny morning, not a cloud in the sky, and birds were chirping sweet songs, everything was happy and bright.   
It took him until late afternoon to get to Mirkwood on his horse, and as he drew closer to Thranduil, the day grew colder and the sun shone a little less brighter.   
He descended his horse and walked over the small bridge that lead to the grand doors that housed the Woodland Realm.   
The guards at the door looked at him in confusion, "Lord Bard, my King Thranduil never informed me of your visiting." One of them said.  
"Yes, well, we got some...business to attend to." Bard replied, a little hurt inside, he knew deep down something was wrong; he could feel it in his whole being.   
The guard nodded and opened the doors, and so Bard walked in, his eyes taking a while to adjust to the darkness of the vast halls.   
The beauty of the place seemed to  remind him of only one person; Thranduil.  From the glistening water falling from high above to the intricately carved pillars and walkways.   
Another elf greeted him and without question, told him that he would lead Bard to his King.   
The walked up, and up, until they were almost at the top, and they came to a platform. It had no door and it seemed to be some sort of library, with shelfs and shelfs of books that curved round the platform and seemed to led all the way to the top of Thranduil's palace.   
Painted on the floor was what could've only been Thranduil and Legolas, a young Legolas, laughing in his fathers arms and putting flowers in his smooth blond hair. The painting was so lovely that Bard felt a lump in his throat, but while he was looking at it, he noticed that the letters he had sent to Thranduil in the last two weeks were scattered carelessly around the floor, and that a pacing elf was stepping all over them.   
The elf that had led him there had gone, and Thranduil hadn't noticed him yet, so he cleared his throat and smiled.   
The elven King stopped dead, and with wide eyes he turned to Bard.   
"Evening, My Lord," Bard said casually, smiling adorably, Thranduil noted, but that was not the reason why he was lost for words. He wasn't ready for this moment, his hands began to shake, his heart began beating uncomfortably fast.   
"Bard," he said breathlessly, "You didn't say you were coming."   
"Yes I did. In my last letter... you didn't reply." Bard said, his bright smile clean off his face.  
"I.." Thranduil looked at the floor and noticed he had threw Bards letters across the floor; that must've been last night, when he had had too much wine and he was thinking too much again. "I'm so sorry," he said gently, his eyes now glistening with unfallen tears.  
Bard stepped closer, and lovingly placed his hands in Thranduils quivering ones.   
"It's okay." Bard soothed softly.   
The tears fell viscously, "It's not just that," Thranduil sobbed, taking his hands out of Bards, "It's what I'm about to do."   
Bard was wholly confused, he didn't want this to be the end. This was meant to be the beginning. But he felt his heart breaking already for he knew by the look on the other Kings face what was coming.   
"Please. No. Stay. Don't go, not yet." Bard begged, crying now too.  
Thranduil was at first shocked at Bard, who somehow already knew what he was going to say; and that made the dreaded words even more reluctant to come out.

It seemed that _this_ was real love. Both Kings, who had only known each other for such a short time, but had connected in such a way, were distraught and it seemed silly that they could feel this way. It seemed only possible that they were meant to be together, that deep down they both needed each other so much.   
It seemed like this was real love because as they stood there, looking into each others blurred but somewhat glowing eyes, they just knew that it was.   
But he said it anyway. No matter how much he wished he was kissing him instead of sending him away, it just couldn't be.   
"We can't be together."   
Silence filled the air, or was it the sound of two hearts breaking?   
"Why?" Bard protested, he was getting angry now, he was in this too, he deserved a say.  
"Because.." Thranduil paused, taking a deep breath,  
 "Because...because..." silence.   
"I love you." he said the words so softly and quietly that they were almost unheard by Bard, and straight away he wished they were.  
Bard stood back, his eyes were wide, he didn't say anything. He loved Thranduil too. Surely he did. Didn't he?   
Yes...  
...was the answer. If only he could say it out loud. But he couldn't, he just stood there, in front of the man who had just confessed his love for him. He just stood there, silent.   
"Say something...please." Thranduil was whispering now, he was hurt. What had he done? But still Bard remained silent.   
A dark look spread across Thranduils face, "Guards!" he shouted powerfully, and immediately two elves came sprinting up to the library.   
"Take him away."   
It was only when he was being dragged away that Bard came back to himself. But it was too late, Thranduil was already broken.   
_He just wanted To Be Loved._   
"No! Thranduil!" He finally broke his silence as he was thrown out the door into the dead of night.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "The sun shines not on us, but IN us."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! This is the last chapter, and I'm actually kinda happy with it !!   
> I would just like to thankyou for reading this fanfic. I would also like to thank all those who have kudos'd and commented, it really really means a lot !!   
> Thankyou, thankyou, I hope you enjoy.   
> Stay lovely.

They didn't see each other for a month after that. A whole month of heartbroken tears, of late nights. A whole month of no stars, it would seem.  
Bard was sure he would never see his love again, for he feared the broken elven king would throw him in the dungeons for even trying. But he knew it was his fault; if he hadn't been so foolish and just told Thranduil he loved him back, because he did, he really really did, then he would be with him now. Laughing, dancing, kissing.   
But as fate, or rather Thorin Oakensheild, would have it; they would see each other again, for the King under the Mountain had called for a council between the three leaders.   
He wanted to discuss the fate of the three kingdoms, if they should unify or not. Bard laughed bitterly when he heard this, he wasn't sure that any type of unification between him and Thranduil was possible after what had happened.   
•••  
The day of the meeting had arrived, and to say Bard was nervous was an understatement. What would happen when they first laid eyes on each other again?   
Would he cry,  
Or had all his tears already been used up?  
Maybe he would fall in love all over again.   
As he made his way up to the magnificent mountain, accompanied by a guard, he began to shake.   
He began to feel the tears welling up inside him, threatening to rush out of his eyes.   
"Master Bard? Are you okay?" His lovely guard asked, they had known each other for a long time.   
"You don't need to call me Master, Fred. You're too wise and too brave to think of me as your master. But thankyou, I'm okay." He turned back and looked at his old friend, who was smiling his familiar smile, reminding him of their younger days, when they used to go out on adventures. It also reminded him of his wedding day, for Fred was his best man, and he saw that wonderful smile just before his beautiful bride walked down the aisle.   
"Well, if you do ever need me, I'm here." Said Fred, and Bard couldn't help but admire his gentle soul.   
"That means a lot, my friend." Bard smiled too, making his face ache. He hadn't smiled in weeks.   
They reached the great doors of Erebor and were greeted by two dwarves, Dwalin and Balin.   
"Welcome, my friends from Dale." Balin said, smiling kindly. Dwalin bowed his head.  
"We are very happy to have been invited to the great halls of your kingdom!" Bard replied.   
The brothers turned and entered the mountain, beckoning the two men to follow.   
As they walked in, Bard heard Fred gasp next to him, for the wrecked state that Erebor was in the day after the battle was no more.   
But Bard wasn't bothered about the awe inspiring architecture surrounding him; his eyes we're fixated on something even more golden.   
He had never truly realised the beauty of Thranduil until now. Yes, of course Bard new that Thranduil was perfectly handsome; but now, now he was just _glowing_.  
The elf turned around at the sound of them entering, and as he saw Bard, he stopped dead in his tracks, jumping back a little. The tears that had now appeared were glistening in his eyes.   
•••  
Later on came the long awaited moment that the man and the elf would have to talk again.   
Excitement and nerves swam about their bodies as they walked towards each other.   
Bard new what he wanted to say, that he did love Thranduil more than he could possibly put into words, but it never came out. So they carried on just staring at each other, wondering who would talk first and knowing that the aching feeling in their chests when their eyes met was something that couldn't be kept quiet.   
The meeting had started, and so Bard and Thranduil had to talk to each other; even though they didn't actually _talk_ to each other. It was an awkward council, and Thorin became restless at the thick air between the two kings sitting in front of him, so he called it a day after only two hours.   
It was a late at night when Bard finally retired to his designated room for the night, having shared a few pints of ale with the dwarves and the hobbits that he had once sprung from his toilet.   
He got washed and changed and lay in the large bed. However, it wasn't the itchy sheets or the noise from the ongoing party downstairs that kept him awake; no, it was the sight of Thranduils heart broken face when he hadn't replied to his confession of love, every time he close his eyes.   
After another hour of tossing and turning, he decided he would do it; he would go to Thranduil and tell him that he loved him too, and he wouldn't leave until everything was okay again.   
He got out of bed and exited his room into the dimly lit hallway. He could make out a small figure tottering towards him, and when he came close, he saw that it was a very, very drunk Bilbo.   
"Bard!" Bilbo shouted, "hello!" and he smiled crazily.   
"Master Baggins," Bard smiled back at the drunken hobbit, "I see you have had an enjoyable night."   
"Oh yes..!" Bilbo exclaimed, "I'm just off to bed now, Thorin is just coming," he giggled like a teenage girl.   
Bards eye brows shot up in surprise, but then, he was no one to judge.   
"That's lovely..say, Bilbo? Could you tell me where The Lord Thranduil is staying?" Bard asked quickly.   
Bilbo raised an eyebrow cheekily, "Oooh, you and the Elven King?" He teased, "he's just down the hall, on the left," Bilbo then proceed to wink, and start to giggle manically.   
"Thankyou, Bilbo."   
"Yes, yes. Have fun!" He said as he walked off into the dark.   
And so, Bard made his way down the hall, and found himself standing with his fist in the air, ready to knock- but he just froze.   
What was he going to say?   
But the next thing that happened was a sure sign that this was meant to be, for Bard didn't need to knock, because Thranduil had already opened the door.   
He stopped dead when he saw Bard, a look of shock on his face.   
"Bard..." He whispered so longingly, "..I was..just coming to see you."   
"Can I come in?" Bard whispered back, afraid to lose this precious moment.   
Thranduil moved out of the way and let Bard in, who closed the door behind him.   
And then they went back to what they had been doing all day..just staring and noting down every single beautiful thing about the other person.   
"I," Bard broke the silence, but didn't finish.   
Instead he moved closer..and closer...and closer to Thranduil until the gap was so small, that they could feel each other's anxious breaths, they could hear each other's beating hearts.   
The white spotlight of the moon shone through a small window in the side of the Mountain. It fell onto Thranduils skin, and reminded Bard of the night they kissed. Oh, how he wanted to kiss his love again.   
So he did.   
Bard finally shut the gap between them, pressing his lips hard and passionately onto Thranduils; and feeling the elf melt into his arms.   
They pushed their bodies tight together, and wrapped their arms around each other's neck, both scared that this was all a dream and that the other person was just going to drift away.   
It was so gentle but so lustful. Full of desire, heat, passion but also love, emotion, a sense of belonging.   
It was like they were floating. They had risen into the air, and they were on top of the world.   
It was wet and salty but the tears falling out of closed eyes made it all the more wonderful.   
It was the sudden realisation that, at last, they had found the one.   
They broke apart, and looked into each other's eyes. They laughed and they cried, and then they kissed some more.   
"I love you too, by the way." Bard said, and Thranduil knew that he meant it, because never had he been kissed like that.   
"Thankyou." he said so softly that the words blew off into the wind. 


End file.
